Vol. 21 - The Wall Street Shuffle

Yuppies, Traders, Traitors, and Yacht Rock

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Though the term’s official coinage is still highly debated, the origin of the ‘yuppie’ is forever embedded in early ‘80s scripture. You know the type: a Patrick-Bateman-esque knave in relentless pursuit of societal significance — flaunting a flashy Rolex, crisp blazer, perfectly shellacked hair, and a fabulously embossed business card.

Today’s equivalent: “Influencers”. Their backdrop is much less boardroom or Wall Street trading floor, more Reykjavík/Bali/Chernobyl. And they’re running themselves ragged vying for attention — and advertising dollars.

Arguably, Influencers have a much simpler go at fame and fortune than their yuppie predecessors: armed with a smartphone, maxed-out credit card, good footwork, and some clever video editing techniques, the modern Influencer can reach untouchable status in literally 15 seconds thanks to… algorithms.

Meanwhile, the yups of yore had to maintain a polished in-person look and deliver whip-smart retorts at the blink of an eye, all while architecting complex long-range backstabbing real-time. This is a talent few possess. And we love ‘em just as much as we loathe ‘em. 

Saddle up, partners. This week, The Fast Times brings you the best — and worst — of the infamous 1980+ yuppie.


Yup It Up / Nantucket Chic Hits Main Street

Banker Burnout / Go Figure, Six Figures Isn’t Worth It

Hip to Be Scared / Ice Nine Kills Release American Psycho-Inspired Music Vid

O Brooks Brothers, Where Art Thou? / Retailer Abandons Post, Post-Bankruptcy 

Under Pressure / Cast of HBO’s Industry Bomb the Ultimate Interview

Timeless Two-Tone Luxury / Wrist Candy For the Wolves of Wall Street

Obituary: Here Lies the Yuppie / A Look Back in Time Magazine

Legend of the NYSE / Wall Street’s Most Photographed Man 

It’s a Rich Eat Rich World / Hedge Fund Yuppies Take Over the Hamptons

A Risky Investment / Traders Trade Coming Out Stories


The homie Jason Diamond, author/editor/speaker/strategist/self-proclaimed “big eater” extraordinaire, assembled the finest of yuptastic onscreen debauchery for your viewing delight — and trust us, he knows yuppies better than most. Don’t snooze on his work, either… it’s the ideal way to pass the time while the VHS is in the rewinder.

Side note, this entire watchlist is R-rated, so be sure to put on your big kid pantsuits…

Curated by: Jason Diamond / Twitter: @imjasondiamond


Hip To Be Square / Christian Bale Espouses the Virtues of Huey Lewis and the News

Even if you could get a reservation at Dorsia, you’d probably lose your appetite after this clip from Mary Harron and Guinevere Turner’s satirical adaptation of Bret Easton Ellis’ 1991 novel “American Psycho” about a serial killing yuppie.

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